Is It Worth It To Enter Relationship Counseling

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By , February 28, 2015 8:29 pm

When it comes to counseling, the one that is most called upon is relationship counseling. Out of every twenty couples, 17 of them have underwent some form of relationship counseling. With good reason, too, since relationships tend to be counter intuitive. Counselors who specialize in relationships have helped couples to live happier and more fulfilled.

To dispel the myths surrounding relationship counseling, it is important to know that it is not about winning or losing or placing blame. The central focus of the counseling is to develop the communication skills needed to learn from your partner and balance your needs with theirs. Blame only helps to alienate and push you partner away. A lot of the problems that cause us to pull our hair out are in fact nothing that is worth getting too angry about, but it takes an outside party to realize it.

Relationship counseling also puts both into a controlled environment where they can vent and get everything out in a safe way. The counselor sets the guidelines and rules the force and enable civilized discussion. Now that is not to say that what works for one couple will work for another. Some couples need a mediator, someone who just listens on the sides. This counselor will set guidelines for communication, allowing the couple to talk things out themselves.

Other couples need someone who will guide the discussion. Attempts to work things out on their own quickly degrades into yelling matches and bare knuckle arguments. Relationship counseling here aims to guide the conversation and not let it get out of hand or uncontrollable. Over all, there is a variety of couples who will need an equally variable number of counselors. Despite this, counseling is statistically certain to improve your relationship.

One of the things that needs to be learned is to identify and address the issues that threaten relationships. Unfortunately, the emotions and stresses that plagues relationships make it especially difficult to identify those issues. That is what relationship counseling is made to do. Counseling will identify the unique problems that prevent a couple from communicating, address the problems that are there and bring the couple to a place that will allow them to thrive.

You may think that your relationship will not be helped by relationship counseling. However, what should be kept in mind is that what is good for a relationship is not something that would seem logical. Counseling can only be help relationships. They enable the free flow of information and communication so that problems existing below the surface can be discovered and addressed.

If you are one of the three out of twenty who can find happiness without entering relationship counseling, then more power to you. You have found something that enables you to communicate and discuss your problems, then you are well ahead of the curve. But if you are one of the 17 out of twenty, then you will find that relationship counseling will improve the quality and happiness in your partnership.

Broken Relationships Rebound The Smart Way

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By , February 27, 2015 1:09 am

How many times have you seen one of your friends break up with a long-term partner only to find, the very next week, someone who was obviously all wrong for them? It’s one of the most common after effects of the end of relationships: rebound dating.

The idea of rebound relationships is so ingrained into the way we think about dating that it just seems natural to look for one after a breakup. There’s something to be said for getting “back in the saddle,” choosing a partner when your judgment is clouded usually does more harm than good overall. If you want to get over your ex fast, there are better ways to do it.

Band-Aid relationships: rebound mindset

The first step to keeping yourself from doing something you’ll regret is to take an honest look at what you’re feeling and understand how those feelings can lead you places you’d rather not go. A lot of times we just miss the companionship and look for someone to fill the gap in our schedule and distract us from the fact that our heart’s just been broken. In that case, make a point of finding a social time-filler that doesn’t involve romance.

Maintain your standards

The best thing you can do to avoid getting involved with someone who’s all wrong for you is stick to your standards. In fact, go ahead and raise them a little just to add a safety buffer. If the person you’re thinking about dating is less kind, less intelligent, less anything that you’d normally want, stay away. The people don’t make for good relationships, rebound or otherwise.

Beware of the handiest person

When we look for someone to rebound with, we need someone fast. We don’t have time to “waste” looking for someone we really click with, so we tend to latch on to someone we already know and have at least some rapport with. It might be a close friend, a co-worker, even someone who works at the grocery store down the street. If you find yourself falling for someone you’ve never been the least bit attracted to before, stop and think about what’s really going on here.

Take time for yourself

Instead of filling your time with go-nowhere dates, get out and make some new friends (that’s “friends,” not “lovers.” There’s a difference.) Get involved in something you’ve always wanted to do but never had time for. Whatever you do, don’t sit around pining for your ex or scouring the bookstore shelves for self help books.

Be gentle with yourself.

Even if your not sobbing into your pillow every night, the end of a relationship will naturally make you feel a little bummed out and low on energy. Take that into account and try not to start any major projects for a few weeks. Instead, treat yourself to some time out to do something you enjoy.

Of course, not every rebound relationship ends up a disaster. If you’re lucky, you’ll have a fun fling. If you do decide to get involved with someone after a breakup, though, make sure you’ve taken a little off by yourself and you’re not lowering your standards. While we can prevent broken relationships: rebound dates gone wrong are easy to avoid.

How ugly has society made you?

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By , February 25, 2015 6:14 am


With media creating hype twenty four seven, and the pressure that we face on that same timeline to always look our best, it’s no doubt that their is soo many ‘after-market’ ways to make ourselves look better.

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With media creating hype twenty four seven, and the pressure that we face on that same timeline to always look our best, it’s no doubt that their is soo many ‘after-market’ ways to make ourselves look better.

We’ve been made to look one way, in the image of our creators (thanks mom & dad); inyet we find ourselves looking to enlarge or reduce parts of our body, change the color of our skin and eyes, among heaps of others modifications just to fit into what society deems to be desirable. You would be hard pressed to find someone that hasn’t been caught up in this meaningless cycle at one point in their life. I’m been in it, heck – I still am in it. I think their is a fine line to be walked with taking pride in the way that you look, without becoming obsessed with it. Wear respectable clothes, brush your teeth, maybe do your hair every once in a while, and for goodness sakes a daily shower, whether you need it or not, goes a long way.

There is soo many different treatments and surgeries out there today, that I think it’s easy for us to overlook how ugly society is really making us. Here is how I’m looking at:

– Conservative – Keeping good hygiene through daily showers, deodorant,etc.
– Riding the line – Getting hair removed by lasers to avoid having to shave excessively
– Extreme – Different surgeries both cosmetic and not

It’s when you are debating getting into the extreme side, that I think you need to step back and think twice to yourself about: “How ugly has society made me”. If you’re willing to go under a knife to change the way you look, society has done something ugly with the beautiful baby that your parents first brought into this world. It’s essential to always have a level head on yourself, and to love yourself for the way that you are. It’s overwhelming the number of people that think that make-up and surgeries,etc are going to change their life. Insecurity and lack of confidence shines through though, and you are still the same on the inside. Beauty is from the inside out!

Are You An Average Guy Dating Beautiful Women

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By , February 23, 2015 11:28 am

Are you still in shock that a beautiful woman has agreed to go on a date with you? It can be difficult dating beautiful women when they always seem way above your league.

It can certainly boost your ego when you walk along with a beautiful woman on your arm. Not only will you feel pretty good yourself, but other men will look at you with more respect too. Other women will actually find you more attractive when they see you dating beautiful women.

You will often see attractive women dating attractive men. They will often date men that are rich and powerful but the downside to this is that these women may not be the most desirable long term partners. When dating rich, powerful men, these women may develop bad habits like being manipulative, vain and very high maintenance.

If you aren’t the usual type of man that beautiful women usually date then you may have some challenges ahead. Why do women tend to date wealthy and powerful men? Here is some advice that can help you to face the challenges of dating beautiful women.

1. Set yourself apart from the other men. All those attractive, wealthy men begin to look alike and women may get bored with that. Be different so you stand out from the crowd and grab her attention.

2. Don’t put her on a pedestal. Men will be all over a beautiful woman and treat her like a princess. Attractive women come to expect men to treat them like royalty and knock themselves out for her. If you ignore her and treat her like you aren’t affected by her looks, then she will be intrigued with you. She will be confused as to why you aren’t treating her like all the other men and she is more likely to pursue you.

3. Focus more on the woman’s friend. You will find that many attractive women will always have a less attractive friend. This is so that they don’t have to compete with their friend for men’s attention if they are the more attractive of the two. Most men will indeed ignore the ‘plain’ friend and pay attention to the beautiful woman and that’s what she expects. If you pay more attention to her friend you will most likely get a reaction from her. She will wonder why you are attracted to her friend and she will be jealous. If she views you as someone that is not interested in her then she will be interested in you.

4. Forget the compliments, instead try teasing her. Most men will rush in with compliments about her beauty. Instead of the compliments, tease her about her flaws, in a light-hearted way of course. She is more likely to pay you more attention when you are interacting in a way that is different to most men.

5. Look past her beauty. Most men see these women as gorgeous and that’s it. It’s rare that they will go deeper and try to connect with her intellectually. Men see these women as sex objects and often that is all they are interested in. Talk to her about her interests and hobbies and you will be surprised at how grateful she will be that you are interested in her for more than just her looks.

6. Play hard to get. Don’t try to get her into bed on the first date. She will probably expect this as most men will try this. If you play hard to get she will become more and more interested in you.

You don’t have to be a rich, handsome, powerful man to date gorgeous women. If you know how to play your cards right then you too can be dating beautiful women!

Bring Love Into Your Life

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By , February 21, 2015 4:56 pm


Do you feel lonely, are you dreaming of the right one who will show up one day and end all the misery you’re going through now?
The bad news is this will not happen.
The good news is YOU can do a lot yourself to feel loved.

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So many people are complaining about the lack of love in their life. They act as if some stranger decided one day to take away the love out of their lives. They hold on to lovers already gone since eternity, or they dream about a partner coming into their life to give them everything they are not able to give themselves. They balance between hope and desperation. They look for love outside themselves and believe one day a charming prince on a white horse will knock at the door and take them away to live for ever happy in a castle for away from reality.

Other people are trying to survive in a bad relationship that holds their greatness hostage. They live in fear and anger every day but don’t know how to get out of this prison.

Do you know such people? Does this sound like you? Do you feel lonely, are you dreaming of the right one who will show up one day and end all the misery you’re going through now?

The bad news is this will not happen.
The good news is YOU can do a lot yourself to feel loved.

Let me explain.
Life is like a building. There are a lot of floors : the ground floor, the cellar, the first floor, second floor and so on. The higher you go in the building, the more light there is, the easier and lighter things are, the more friendly and energetic people are, the higher are the vibrations and most of all : the more love there is.

Picture this building of life in your mental eye. In the cellar you will find people like rapers, thiefs, harassers, killers, people who beat their children or companion and others who made a life out of hurting others.
On the groundfloor you will find a lot of people. In fact most of humanity lives here. These are the ones who content themselves by vegetating instead of living. They don’t think by themselves, they undergo life. They do nothing. They live like robots. They go to their job every day, come home every day, watch the same television program every day with a beer in one hand and a hotdog in the other hand. They do not dream. They are stuck in their lifestyle and think everything will always be the same.

Then you go up. As I said, the higher you get, the easier, the lighter life is. Life IS easy, life IS light. The cellar, groundfloor and lower floors are creations from the human mind. We created these lifestyles by our heavy thoughts, thoughts about scarcity, fear, death, anger, sadness, revenge and so on. Here are the lives of those who choose to think low energy thoughts. Those who live in fear, hate, jealousy, doubts, low self esteem, troubles. Those have bad relationships, where struggle and anger and negativity set the tone. They are not happy. They maintain the illusion everything is someone else’s fault and they have either to wait for the other to change, so their life will change, or they have to destroy the other one to have a better life (think of the one who kills the husband of the woman he wants to live with, or those who kill other minded people in order to be free to live like they want). This will never give freedom or love.

So what to do if you want to move up in that building of life and live free and in love?

First you have to make a decision. Yes, you have to decide WHERE you want to be. On which floor do you want to live your life now?

Is it the cellar? No, I don’t think so. Is is the groundfloor? I don’t think it either. Let’s say you want to be at the 17th floor. But you feel you are at this moment in your life at the 3rd floor only. You hate your job, you have a lousy relationship with your partner, you’re in bad shape and your energy is low.
So you decided you wanted a life in the vibration of the 17th floor, where there is love, real friendship, positive expectations, inner strength, power, a job you like, health and wealth.

What to do? You decided where you want to be. What you will do now? Should you wait until someone will knock on your door to take you there? No way! Will never happen! Even if you would meet someone with an energy level of 17, he will never carry you from the 3rd to the 17th floor, because he will be exhausted. It needs to be YOUR decision and YOUR action!!

So YOU have to move yourself up. How? Read! Read more! Read how you can create your life by changing your thoughts and your behavior! Go to workshops where you can learn how to unleash you inner power. Use the wonderful information bank which is called Internet and which offers you a bunch of positive information and e-courses (often for free). Surround you with loving people. Learn how to love yourself.

So first you decide where you want to be. Than you do whatever you can to get there, on your own. You may ask help of course, you may find yourself a coach (which is really a good decision!) but don’t look for somebody to carry you. You will fall down immediately the moment he puts you down. If you didn’t get there by yourself, it won’t last, it is not worth anything because you moved yourself up with somebody else’s energy and you are depending on his energy.

Once you get at the floor of your choice, let’s say 17, you will meet automatically people who vibrate at this level of energy. Energy-17 people. Loving, caring, wonderful people. People who feel good about themselves and who don’t need others to steal their energy. They learned how to generate energy by themselves. They are not slaves. They are not dominators. They love and respect others.

Do you want to meet someone like that? Do you want to share your life with somebody who has a 17-energy (or more)? Go there! Go at their level and you will meet them, that’s a guarantee!

Move yourself up.

If you live in a bad relationship right now, and you do whatever you can to get yourself moving higher, you will see what will happen. Your partner, who is still vibrating on energy 3 or 2 or on cellar-level won’t be able to follow you and you will take separate roads.

Don’t make the mistake of trying to pull someone up who wants to stay at his low level. You will never succeed. Especially women should be aware of this : don’t spoil your energy at trying to get others moving up with you. It’s a waste of time. Everybody should decide for himself. Don’t carry others on your back, you will crack down! Decide for yourself, go for it, and see what happens. The higher you get in energy-levels, the better it will be. There you will agree with me : life is wonderful!

Article 4 In a Series of Articles on Keep Your Romance Alive

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By , February 19, 2015 9:27 pm

Play Hooky from Work

Do you remember the times you ditched your sixth period class to go hang out with the person you had a crush on? While you can’t do it too often, playing hooky from work can jumpstart a relationship.

Plan to have some kind of excuse that requires you to leave the office at noon. That will give you time to have a leisurely lunch, a romantic encounter, and still be done before the kids get home from school.

Playing hooky also tells your partner that while you take your work seriously, they are important to you too. When you are climbing the corporate ladder, it is still important to take time out for the people you love.

Be Aware of Flash Points in Your Relationship

There are certain points in every couple’s life that are triggers for one partner to have an affair. When you are aware of the possibility that the relationship could break and you address these points through good communication, you can save yourself the heartbreak of an affair.

For instance, when a woman has just had a baby, the man may decide to have an affair. There are many reasons for this. He may have trouble seeing his wife as a sexual being. Another issue is that the husband may be jealous of all of the attention the new mother is paying to the baby. He may go looking for a little mothering himself in the arms of another woman.

Of course, she might not feel all that sexual herself and may not be encouraging intercourse. The work involved in having a new baby can leave people with no energy for sex. New babies are also a financial drain and the stress of not having enough money can affect a couple’s desire for one another. Having another person – the baby – in the house can be a turn off in and of itself. Couples should talk about how having a baby affects your sexual feelings.

Ironically, having your children leave home can be as much of a stress on your sex life as having them come into the world in the first place. The empty nest syndrome can leave one or both partners feeling purposeless. This empty feeling can result in one partner, often the woman, looking for reassurance in the bed of another person.

When elderly parents move into the home, it can put many strains on a relationship. There are new demands on the household. Additionally, one person may resent having the other partner’s extended family intruding on their lives. Again, talking about feelings can help. Counseling may also be needed.

When someone loses their job, they may feel a loss of personal power. They may need an ego boost. And, being with someone who finds them attractive may serve to give them some false confidence. When your spouse loses a job, make sure that you reassure them that you still find them attractive and important. Don’t nag as that will drive them away.

Financial crisis of all kinds can lead to affairs. Money tends to be the number one problem in relationships, so it is no mystery that a financial crisis would cause a crisis in the marriage. Be open about the money problems you are having and work together to find solutions that you can live with.

Retirement is another time in one’s life where a person feels vulnerable. If your career has been what defines you, suddenly being at loose ends can throw you. You might seek to be redefined through having an affair with another (usually younger) person other than your spouse. When your spouse retires, have an open conversation about what is going on in this new phase of life.

Finally, when a partner comes down with a long term illness, whether it is physical or mental, the stress of caring for the other person can lead to a partner seeking uncomplicated solace somewhere else. If you are the partner with the illness, bring up the issue of sexual and emotional support with the other person.

Can This Marriage Be Saved You Might Be Shocked

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By , February 18, 2015 2:29 am

If you’re on the verge of divorce, you maybe wondering to yourself, can this marriage be saved? The good news is the answer is probably yes. There are very few marriages these days that can’t be saved, if you’re willing to so the work.

A lot of people should ask themselves can this marriage be saved, but a surprising amount don’t. The divorce rate is over 50% these days, and most of this is because far too many people pull the trigger on their marriages far too early.

There are certain circumstances where can the question this marriage be saved is the absolute wrong question to ask. If your marriage is physically or mentally abusive, then there is no question you need to get out. You absolutely can’t risk your safety, and most abusers will never change, so don’t even consider trying to fix it.

Thankfully, only a tiny percentage of marriages fall under that horrible caveat, so we can move on to your marriage. To answer the question can this marriage be saved, you need to first ask yourself if you really want the marriage to be saved.

The truth is, you may not actually want to save your marriage. All too often, this kind of reaction is a reflex. Most of us don’t like change, and splitting from someone you’ve been sharing your life with is just about as massive a change as you can possible have. It’s natural to want to fight this even though it may not be the best decision you can make.

If you still love them, if you can still see a future with them in it, then there’s a good chance that you fix the marriage. The very first thing you need to do to stop a divorce is open the lines of communication in your marriage again.

This means that you’re going to have to put aside the anger. It doesn’t matter if it was their fault or your fault. It doesn’t matter what the problem was that lead you down this road be it cheating or money problems or just growing apart.

If you’re still stewing in your own anger, then you’re not going to be able to move past the problem and communicate properly. You need to be able to talk to each other and try to find out how bad your relationship has been damaged. This is how you find the answer to the question can this marriage be saved?

You need to be looking for what you still have in common. You need to find the part that wants the marriage to be saved. If there is something that you still have in common, something that you can build on. It doesn’t take much, all it takes is the willingness to do the work and take the time to make it better.

This isn’t easy work, but fortunately there are guides and systems available that will show you the way. You just need to remember that the answer to the question can this marriage be saved is always yes, and you’re halfway there.

Dealing With Break Up

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By , February 16, 2015 7:54 am

Dealing with break up is a very difficult thing to do. After all a break up involves that relationship you worked at crashing and burning and you losing the love of your life. So dealing with that can be a very difficult affair.

You might be left sitting there having no idea what you should do. Your emotions are running amok and you are generally just lost. But you do not have to stay this way. There are a multitude of ways for dealing with a break up.

While not every method works for everybody, there are some common tips to help you get through your break up. Even if one does not work, and does not help alleviate the pain, you should keep trying until you find one that does work for you.

1. Hang with friends. Friends are your pillars of support during times such as these. They are there for you, lending a shoulder for you to lean on. Talk with them about your troubles and go out with them to have fun.

They say laughter is the best medicine and that holds true for break ups as well. Go out for a night on the town with your buddies. Have a good time and forget all about your relationship troubles. This is a great way for dealing with break up.

2. Get active. A problem many people face after a break up is they get lethargic and just mope around all day every day. That is not only unhealthy, but it forces you to dwell on the negative emotions of the break up. Instead of doing that, try to get active.

Go to the gym or go for a bike ride. This not only helps distract you from your relationship problems, but it can also help you get in shape, or stay in shape. It does not necessarily have to be some extremely physical activity either.

The main focus is to keep your mind occupied so you do not have time to dwell on your recent break up. So picking up a hobby or going back to school are also great ways to occupy your time and forget all about the troubles you are facing.

3. Remain positive. Positivity is important. It can help you see the world in a better light and improve your mood. Some people believe that positivity also influences the world around you. So if you remain positive good things might just go your way. And even if that is not the case, at the very least you are happier then if you had stayed sulking and being negative.

Dealing with break up is never easy, and despite everybody going through it we still have yet to find any concrete methods for helping us get past the pain. However we have gotten some pretty good ideas along the way and even if these tips do not help you, there are countless more for you to try.

In the end, a break up is not the end of your life. It may hurt now but time heals all wounds and some day you will find the love of your life and be happy again.

How To Get Back Your Ex

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By , February 14, 2015 12:19 pm

Break ups happen every day, whether you are the one breaking it off or the one getting dumped. It is often a painful experience and a lot of times we are not quite ready to let go of that person. So you might stop and ask yourself “how to get back your ex”.

Well, there are no concrete methods for getting your ex back since people will split off for any number of reasons. And sometimes when it is over, it is really just over. But a lot of time there is a chance that you can win your ex back, you just need to know how.

1: Acknowledge. Acknowledge that your relationship is over and accept this reality. Too often will people try to live in denial and refuse to accept that this is the truth. By accepting this reality you can take a more objective stance and understand where your ex is coming from and why they decided to break off your relationship.

If you know why they decided to call it quits, you have a chance of fixing the problems they had. And if you can fix the problems they had with the relationship, you will not run the risk of repeating them next time around.

2: Give it time. One important factor in how to get back your ex is to make sure to give it time. Nothing will happen over night and if you try to rush it, you will squander any chance you had of getting back together. Let yourself and your ex have some time to organize your thoughts and come to terms with the break up.

Take this time to enjoy life, hang out with friends or delve into that hobby you have wanted to do. Being happy with your life is another bonus you can present to them when you finally talk to them again. Show them that you are living your life how you want and you would like to share it with them.

3: Don’t beg. This is vitally important, never beg. Nobody wants somebody who will beg them and annoy them. So if you end up begging you are guaranteed to fail in your mission of getting back together. While it may seem hopeless and you might be desperate, do not give into temptation and beg.

4: Re-engage. The last step is to finally open up communication between you and ex. You need to take it slow and steady and treat it like a brand new relationship, since that is essentially what it is. Show them the changed you and show them what they are missing.

Break ups are hard and there is no real guide book on how to get back your ex. But if there is a chance of it succeeding, these steps can help you on the right path.

And even if it does not work, even if you can not get back together, do not worry too much. People go through break ups every day and manage to move on with their lives. It may hurt now but eventually time will heal those wounds and you will find somebody else to be happy with.

How to Increase Your Power to Manifest

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By , February 12, 2015 5:02 pm


Many people insist that working hard is the key to getting what they desire. Those people do not understand the power of generating a magnetic charge in and around their body which sucks the things they desire towards themselves. This secret power can truly transform your life faster than any physical action.

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Do you want to have powerful life changing transformation in your life? Sometimes the manifesting process can see a bit daunting. One minute you are told that all you ever need are 3 simple steps but even after applying those steps you realize that something else is missing.

The Manifesting Secret that Few People Know

You have tried visualization, you have tried affirmations, you have tried vision boards, all with little results. The whole process makes you feel like the little engine that could. You huff and puff but all the while you are moving uphill with great effort instead of flowing like a river. That’s because there is a powerful manifesting science that must be understood. That secret is the power of accumulated energy. Energy is power. It is the energy, emotion and intention that accelerate your ability to manifest.

The Power to Generate Magnetism

The more good energy you have within you with your intentions the more power you generate. You can create a core magnetic charge that literally pulls your desires to you with very little effort. Rather than working or going out to get what you desire you can literally become magnetic to your desires and watch as your desires come to you.

This Kills Your Dreams

This lack of understanding with the principles of manifesting causes many to get quite frustrated. They start of by trying to create a vision board, they do affirmations but somehow they know that something is missing and soon enough they fail to create the results at all. The secret is that they have not generated enough of a charge towards their desires. Those people who insist that manifesting requires hard work do not understand that the human body and mind can work like a magnet creating an energy of magnetic energy that sucks their desires towards them.

Magnetism backed by an increased power draws the right people, the right circumstances with little physical effort on your part.

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