Article 4 In This Series of Article on A Nice Guy

By , August 7, 2015 7:42 am

Jerks Don’t Self Censor

Most nice guys believe that there are things that are appropriate and things that are not appropriate to say when meeting any person – including women they’d like to date – for the first time. While there are social boundaries that you won’t cross (you’re a nice guy after all), you need to expand the limits of what you consider to be socially acceptable.

Jerks come off as fun, interesting and exciting because they don’t worry about offending anyone else. Remember, they only care about their own concerns, not those of the people around them. Therefore, they will talk about the things that come to mind and make jokes that nice guys censor out. They even broach sensitive topics of conversation without batting an eye.

When nice guys talk to a girl they like, they hold back. They don’t bring up sex, even in a joking manner. Many have difficulty even demonstrating any interest in liking the girl. This makes nice guys seem like boring guys in the eyes of many women.

On the other hand, the Jerk will come along, make an off color joke, tell a racy story, or even make fun of the girl. He doesn’t care if he offends someone. This is want comes naturally to him. This attitude is a breath of fresh air to many women who mistake it as confidence.

As they spend time around the Jerk, they come to find that what they initially saw as confidence is really narcissism. But at that point, you have already missed the chance of a connection with these women. There is a good chance that you will never cross paths again.

If you want to display this kind of confidence without turning into a complete Jerk, loosen up when you meet women. You should be yourself and not try to please the woman. When you stop “trying” to make an impression, you start to actually make one.

It is a good thing to care about what a girl thinks. It is good to be on your best behavior. But, that comes after you’ve secured a date with a girl. You have to get her attracted to you before you can move forward, and you do this by having confidence that you have something to offer on your own terms.

A further point here is that it is okay to be sexual around women who you are sexually interested in. In fact, flirting and other sexual behaviors are a very important signal to a woman that you are interested in her. Joking about sex can go a long ways toward letting a woman know that you are interested in being more than friends.

The final point I’m going to make on this topic is that when nice guys approach a woman, too often they have diarrhea of the mouth. They go on and on about boring things. They talk about themselves or their jobs when they should be cracking jokes, teasing the women they are with, and showing them a good time.

When you bore a girl to tears, she is not going to be attracted to you. Remember, you are not so much worrying about what she thinks. You are thinking about how to be a powerful babe magnet.

Men who are stiff and formal or who cannot control what comes out of their mouth bore women. You’ve got to be confident, loose, and sexy.

Article 5 in this series of articles will pick up where this article left off, tomorrow.

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