Break Up Relationship-Always Keep Your Dignity

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By , March 31, 2015 7:04 am

How do you get over the pain of a break up relationship? One day at a time, that’s how. Sometimes, just one minute at a time. With time and a smattering of patience thrown in, you can pretty much make it through anything.

Keep a level head on your shoulders and accept the break up relationship with dignity. Do not do or say anything that could potentially come back to bite you in the rear end. Just accept the reality of the situation, cut your losses and learn to move on.

When the dust settles after the initial break up. You need to allow time for the grieving. You bet, I said grieving. The grieving process can be a lot like it is when someone you love dies. There are certain steps you must take to come out the other side. So let yourself feel the sadness, or the anger and resentment, for as long as it takes to get through it.

If the hurt is too much to handle then find someone to talk to or go online and join a forum or a chat room about lost loves and get some advice there. In this digital world today this is where most of the “therapy” happens and you can find forums or chat rooms or blogs on any subject under the sun.

If the relationship you were in was the type that made you put some of your friendships on the back burner then go ahead and reconnect with those that you set aside. They will be glad to hear from you. Some of them may have their nose out of joint because they will feel slighted but if you apologize then all should be well and you can back to being friends again.

The same thing applies to your family. Plan a family dinner and cook all your favorite dishes. Make this a real “feel good” type reunion, so to speak. Family is family and they are there for you no matter what.

One more thing to remember, do not attempt to start seeing someone new unless and until you are completely ready to. This sort of behavior can only result in more hurt. For you and the new guy, too. Rebound relationships rarely ever work. Just take your time and learn to be yourself for a while.

Change up your routine. Find something new to do with your free time. Take some day trips to places you have always wanted to go. There is bound to be somewhere real close by that you have never been to before.

Here’s what you do, get an atlas or just a map of your area and check out what types of things there are within a 100 mile radius of you house. Make a list and then just start at the top and go on down the list. Pretty soon the break up relationship will be a distant memory.

Compassion Means Just As Much As Passion

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By , March 29, 2015 12:37 pm

It’s amazing just how many selfish and self-centered people there are in the world today. This is a fact that’s never clearer than when you are in a relationship with one of them. That’s right; that person that was once the love of your life turns out to be one of the most non-compassionate individuals you’ve ever laid your eyes on. The only thing that may come as a bigger shock to people is when they’ve got a partner that cheats on them because that’s something else that most people never see coming until it’s staring them in the face.
Passion is a major factor when it comes to romantic relationships. There have been many relationships that have simply fizzled out due to the lack of passion within it. So, yes, passion is vital in any relationship that hopes to have a prayer of making it. On the other hand, compassion means just as much in a relationship as passion. This is a word that means you and your partner have the ability to care about how each of you feel when it comes to events that happen in life.
For example, suppose that you and your partner have been planning to attend this huge Super Bowl party for over a month. Then, on the morning of the big day, you wake up with a raging fever, cough, and laryngitis. You’re so weak from the fever that you can barely move let alone get up and fix yourself some honey tea and toast. Now, a COMPASSIONATE partner would make sure that you stay put right in bed where you need to be. Then, he goes to the kitchen, brews your honey tea and serves it to you in bed. He makes a quick check of the medicine cabinet to see what he needs to buy from the drugstore for you, makes sure you’re all settled, and then goes off to load up on flu and cold remedies.
By the time he returns home, it’s getting very close to the time of the party. You tell him that he should go anyway even though you’re sick. A COMPASSIONATE partner will insist on skipping the party in favor of staying at home and looking after you. It’s not like you just have the sniffles. He wants to be sure that you’re well cared for, get plenty of fluids without having to fix them yourself, and that he’s close by in case you get worse.
A self-centered and selfish partner will gather up whatever flu medications you have on hand and put them on your nightstand with a cup of water that he poured from the bathroom sink. If all you’ve got is ibuprofen, that’s what he’ll put on your nightstand. He’ll sleep right up to about an hour before he’s due at the party, shower, get dressed, and off he’ll go. You could die while he’s gone and he wouldn’t know until he’s returned.
It’s pretty simple to see why compassion is vital to a successful relationship. There has to be caring involved. If there isn’t, then you’re truly wasting your time and need to move on.

Is A Marriage Definition The Key To A Happy Marriage

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By , March 27, 2015 5:53 pm

The marriage definition most of us use is “the state of being a married couple voluntarily joined for life”, but that is not going to help your marriage. If you’ve been having trouble with your relationship with your spouse, or even if you haven’t, you may need to come up with your own marriage definition.

In modern America, more than half of all marriages end in divorce. This means that the odds are stacked against you from the start. People attribute the failure of their marriage to many things, from infidelity to problems with money, but the truth is, there’s usually one cause for most divorces: lack of communication.

The problem is that people have different expectations of what they want and can get out of their marriage. While this may be a small problem in the beginning of a marriage, it can rapidly snowball until too much damage has been done for the marriage to be repaired. What you need to do, as early as possible, is create your own marriage definition.

A marriage definition is a concrete, agreed upon set of expectations and limitations. When you do this, you make sure that your spouse and you have the same ideas about what your relationship is supposed to be. Without this, it’s entirely possible that you and your spouse’s definitions are going to be different enough to cause problems.

For example, the marriage definition you use might be that you spend every moment together. Your spouse might have the idea that because you’re married that you have a bond that does require you to see each other constantly. If you’re working off different expectations, you’re going to be setting yourself up for heartache.

It’s natural for us to assume that other people think like we do; it’s even more natural to think that your spouse, your heart and soul, the person you’re going to spend the rest of your life with, will automatically understand us.

The fact is, unless you’re very, very lucky, being in synch like that is not something that just happens. It’s something you have to work at, and that’s why you have to take the earliest possible time and set down with your partner and talk about exactly what you want. What you need to do is create a new marriage definition.

This is not necessarily going to be an easy thing to do. Most of us don’t like to have these kinds of conversations, but it’s something you really need to do. Even if your spouse, or soon to be spouse, is reluctant, sit them down and have the conversation. You need to know exactly what each of you thinks about and wants from your relationship.

What you’re trying to do here is come to an agreement. You need to know ahead of time what you both want and what compromises you’re willing to make and need to make to have a successful relationship.

The best thing you can do is to create a new marriage definition for yourselves. This is the way to find the kind of marriage that will keep you together forever. If you need help working through the process, there are lots of resources available to help create the marriage of your dreams.

Can A Marriage Quiz Hurt Your Relationship

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By , March 25, 2015 10:10 pm

A marriage quiz, will it hurt or help your relationship? This is a question you should be asking yourself before you submit your spouse or yourself to the quiz. The general truth of the matter is that more information is always better than less, but you have to be careful about interpreting the results of a marriage quiz.

Quizzes are popular; if they weren’t they wouldn’t show up so often in women‘s magazines, purporting to tell you the truth about this or that. It’s also true that asking the right questions about your marriage can help your marriage become stronger.

The trouble is, an incomplete or too brief marriage quiz cab can cause you to become insecure, which can create problems, or at least stress, where there doesn’t have to be any. This is the primary reason that you need to take many, if not most of these quizzes with a fairly large grain of salt.

You cannot, no matter how convenient it might be, determine the future of your marriage by comparing the foods you like. Good marriages are not based on common culinary preferences, and a good marriage quiz isn’t based on this either.

Even the less silly quizzes aren’t really perfect because there are simply too many variables within every marriage. Which is a fancy way of saying that every relationship works differently, so any quiz that isn’t custom designed for your marriage is going to be painfully inadequate.

That isn’t to say there isn’t value behind the basic idea behind a marriage quiz, which is finding out more about your marriage. If you were forced to narrow down the primary reasons for marriages ending in divorce, then not communicating would be the reason. Most people simply don’t know enough about what is really going on in their marriage.

For this reason, coming up with your own marriage quiz might be an excellent idea. We have a tendency to keep our heads in the sand, not doing anything or even acknowledging that there is a problem until it absolutely can’t be denied.

At that point, it’s going to be much harder to fix the problems. A better solution is ask the right questions early and often. Make sure over the course of your marriage that you are always giving it a little tune up. Create your own marriage quiz and you will be well on the way.

You need to sit down with your spouse and ask yourselves questions about the marriage. Where is it going? What do we want? What bothers you? You need to answer these questions openly and honestly, and then act on the answers.

There are very few problems that can’t be solved in a relationship, and this kind of marriage quiz will put you on the right track. There are many, many guides and systems available to help correct any problems you find. All you need to do is find the help and guide that you need to create a better, stronger marriage.

Article 6 and Conclusion In a Series of Articles on Keep Your Romance Alive

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By , March 24, 2015 3:32 am

Reach Out and Touch Someone

Between your telephone, your cell phone for texts, and email, you should be able to send a love message to your spouse during the day. If you see a news story that she might be interested in, email it to her. Text him when you find out that his baseball team just won their playoff game.

If you know that something stressful is happening that day, give them a little moral support. For instance, 15 minutes before her big presentation, send her a text telling her that you know she’ll do great. If he has his annual review at 2:00, call him at 3:00 and ask him if he wants to talk about it.

When you use the electronics at your disposal to keep in touch, you send the very serious message that you love your partner and that you are thinking about him or her even when you’re not around. This kind of connection will strengthen the marriage.

Show Your Appreciation

You can show your appreciation for your partner in ways big and small. For instance, after he takes out the trash, simply saying “thanks for taking out the trash” not only reinforces the behavior, it lets him know that you appreciate the role he is playing in maintaining the house.

When a spouse goes out of their way to do a big job, it is especially important to show your appreciation. For instance, if she stayed up late typing up an important sales report for you, buy her flowers or take her out to dinner the next day.

Making a routine of appreciation is a good idea. Just giving him a quick kiss every time he comes home from work is a powerful signal that you appreciate him in your life.

Make a point of telling her you love her at least once a day. Be creative, but make sure that before she goes to sleep at night that she’s heard it at least once.

Do creative or innovative things once in a while to show you appreciate your spouse. For instance, write “I love you” with one of her old lipsticks on the bathroom mirror. Or, put a love note in his sack lunch.

You can also go out of your way to do something your partner enjoys but you hate. She’ll sense your appreciation for her when you present her with Nutcracker tickets if she loves ballet but it puts you asleep. You’ll score even more points if you stay awake during the performance!

Make a point of showing your appreciation for your partner often and in a variety of ways.

Be Loving In Front of Your Kids

Some people restrict their Public Displays of Affection. While draping yourself all over your spouse’s body at McDonalds might be uncalled for, showing your kids that you love each other is important.

First of all, it shows that mommy and daddy have a special relationship and it is different from the relationship between parents and children.

Second, it alleviates their fears that you are going to separate. They have many friends whose parents have divorced. When your kids see you hold hands and kiss, they have visible proof that you are still in love and that their family is secure.

Finally, it models loving behavior that they will take with them into their own marriages. One of the best things you can do for your kids is to give them a firm foundation for building their own families one day.

Conclusion

Falling in love is relatively easy. Staying in love takes more work. If you make the effort to keep the romance alive, your relationship will flourish.

Think of your relationship as a garden. If it is neglected, ugly weeds will develop. But, if you weed the area and prune the flowers – really work at it – you will have something beautiful.

And, just as a gardener enjoys both the work of gardening and the final result, the process of working on the relationship and not just the benefits from the work, can be enjoyable.

Choices

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By , March 22, 2015 8:26 am

1022

The power of personal choice.

choices,prosperity,health,co-creation

All that you create or do not create in your life- comes from choice. Embrace and understand the dynamics of this essential ingredient of power. You suffer when you dis-empower yourself by feeling that you are not in control of your destiny. Freedom lies in understanding that you choose everything! Even in “inaction” there is a choice. In reality there is no true inaction or stagnation.

You can justify your situation by proclaiming, “I have no choice” “I cannot do anything to change my circumstances” “there is nothing I can do” etc. That is a false belief. You can “choose” to allow the outer world to affect how you see your situation- yet; there is never a situation in which you do not have power and a choice.

With each choice, there is a consequence and an energetic price that must be paid. So, it is not that you do not have a choice- you are only choosing which energetic price you choose to pay.

If you are currently in a working situation in which you are unhappy, you can make several choices.

You can choose to stay because you are fearful of change, of the economy or whether or not you can find another means of income. The price you will pay for this choice is continued feelings of boredom, anger, hopelessness, lethargy and depression. Eventually this feeling will affect other areas of your life.

You can choose to stay- yet, change the energetic of how you see your situation. The simple act of using an empowering thought form can create a dramatic change in how you see your situation. “I will stay in this job because it is providing me with an income at this time. I will keep my eyes open for new opportunities and know that this is a temporary situation and I can choose again at any time”.

You can choose to leave the job with the understanding that you are a creative being and can manifest a new source of income. From an outer view, this looks as if it is the most “expensive” choice in terms of energy. Yet, on another level it is not. What is required is a profound faith.

The first of these three examples is actually the most “expensive” for to continue to live under such circumstances will rob you of your life force. The most gentle of the three is the second option and the most daring and magical is the last.

The same wisdom applies to relationships (both platonic and romantic)

You can choose to stay in an unhappy, stagnant or abusive relationship. You can continue to complain about how miserable you are and how you cannot leave the relationship for various reasons. You can justify and make excuses for your circumstances- yet; all the while you will continue to live in anxiety and pain. You can choose to continually dream about what else may be out there for you- yet, never giving yourself an opportunity to explore the possibilities. The price for this choice is an un-calculatable amount.

You can choose to stay in the relationship with the affirmation of “I love this person and I choose to communicate my feelings with them to help bring about the needed changes. I will focus on the positive qualities and begin to let those be the guiding force. After a period of time, if I am still unhappy and see that the situation will not change, then I can choose again”. By doing this, you empower yourself by knowing that you are staying because it is YOUR CHOICE- not because you have no other options.

You can choose to leave the relationship and understand that this choice may lead to some pain and loneliness for a short time. You may feel sadness and loss, yet with that will come an undeniable sense of freedom. The level of your anxiety, negative thoughts and feelings will diminish, making way for a higher vibration of life affirming energy. Your affirmation would be “I am choosing to leave this relationship/friendship because it is not contributing to my joy and ultimate happiness. I know it may be painful for a little while- yet, I also know there are billions of people on the planet and numerous opportunities to meet new friends and lovers.”

When you use the words choose or choice in an affirmation, prayer or thought- the ears of the Angels perk up and they listen. The Universe begins to realign your world to meet that choice. There is so much magic in the understanding of this wisdom.

The same principle applies to what you view as “missing” in your life. You want to create a business, prosperity, a new job or a relationship yet you see that nothing is manifesting in your life. You can CHOOSE how you see your situation. You can make conscious choices as to how to get to the place you want to be. Statements like “I will never work for myself, I do not have the means to create my own business.” “I will never find a good job”, “I will never meet my soulmate/twinflame”, “I will always be poor”, “I will never get what I want” – all reinforce the CHOICE to create more of the same.

Choose creative and life affirming statements and thought forms and watch how your life is transformed. The Angels stand ready to assist you in your choices to create your desires.

I choose to take steps to immerse myself in the knowledge and learning I need to start my own business. I choose to put all my energy to creating what I want.

I choose to KNOW that there is a wonderful abundance of potential life partners and friends in the world for me. I choose to attract individuals who I will enjoy being with.

I choose to embrace HEALTH and vitality.

I choose to feel good.

I choose to allow prosperity to flow into my life.

I choose to allow my spiritual insight and faith to be my guiding force.

Paula Picard Psychic and Spiritual Teacher
www.paulapicard.com
314.308.2053

Tips for Average Guys Dating Beautiful Women

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By , March 20, 2015 1:29 pm

Can you believe that she accepted a date with you? Dating beautiful women can be a challenge because men put them on a pedestal.

Dating beautiful women is a real ego-booster to most men. They not only make you feel good about yourself, but they increase your status in the eyes of other men. Ironically, they also increase your desirability in the eyes of other women too!

Highly attractive women have a lot of opportunities to date rich, powerful, and attractive men. As a result, as a group, they tend to develop some bad habits that make them less desirable as long term partners. For instance, they are likely to be vain, high maintenance, and manipulative.

If you happen to be dating beautiful women and aren’t very wealthy or particularly attractive, you have some challenges to deal with. Here’s some advice about how to handle dating beautiful women.

1.) Be different. When every man is fawning over a woman, they begin to look alike to her. You stand out by being different.

2.) Treat her badly. If every man is treating her like a goddess, there is nothing you can do to differentiate yourself. But if you ignore her, act unaffected by her good looks, and avoid looking lustful, she is likely to want to pursue you. You have become the guy who didn’t knock himself out for her – and that’s attractive to her.

3.) Ignore her. When you see a beautiful woman with her plain sidekick (and she will have one), focus in on her friend. The beautiful woman will get insanely jealous because she can’t stand any other female getting attention (hence, her plain friend) and she will begin to pursue you. This is how you start dating beautiful women.

4.) Tease her. Most men who want to date a particularly beautiful woman will suck up with complements. Instead, take the route of teasing her. Point out her flaws in a lighthearted way. That way, she’ll want to work to get you.

5.) See her as a complex woman. Most men dating beautiful women look at them as pretty packages. Go deeper. Talk about her hobbies and interests. Make her comfortable by talking about the things which engage her mind.

6.) Wait to call her. If you get her number, don’t call the next day. Wait a few days to call her. She expects you to be panting for her and will respect you more if you don’t seem desperate.

7.) Don’t push for sex. Okay, the ultimate reason for dating beautiful women is because you are sexually attracted to her. But, she knows that every guy is hot to get her into bed. But “playing hard to get,” you pique her interest in you.

Dating beautiful women is not for the faint of heart. But, even if you don’t have the wealth of Bill Gates or the power of Henry Kissinger, you may find that treating an extremely attractive woman with some distance may be the ultimate aphrodisiac.

How To Make Your Ex Boyfriend Want You Back

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By , March 18, 2015 6:23 pm

All those tips on how to approach your ex are fine, but wouldn’t you rather know how to make your ex boyfriend want you back and come to you first? It’s not only easier, it also gives your relationship a better chance of survival when you let your guy come to his own conclusions instead making false promises or blackmailing him with guilt. Just a few simple tactics can get you started.

Rein in your emotions

If you want to permanently drive off your ex, go ahead and call him up and pour out your deepest feelings for half an hour. If you want to know how to make your ex boyfriend want you back, though, the first thing you need to learn is how to express your feelings in a more guy-friendly way. When you get a chance to talk to your ex, be the same confident, easy-going woman you were when you first met.

Improve yourself

Instead of sitting home wallowing in misery, get out and start doing all those things you always wanted to do, but never had time for. Buy a new camera and start improving your photography skills, brush up on your French, or sign up for a karate class. It doesn’t really matter what; as long as it’s something you want to do. One little tip, though: since you are, after all, trying to figure out how to make your ex boyfriend want to back, try to get involved in something you know he’d enjoy to. That way you have a ready excuse to meet up.

Take care of your looks

Sure, looks aren’t everything, but as far as men’s feelings of attraction are concerned, they do matter. That doesn’t mean you have to run out and get plastic surgery and the wardrobe of a Cosmo cover model, though. Instead, become the most beautiful version of you that you can. Take some time to learn which fashions flatter your figure, which hairstyle compliments your face, and pick up a few makeup tricks to highlight your best features.

Get your life in order

Despite the presumption that guys want to stay bachelors as long as possible, there are plenty of men out there who do want to get married and start a family. These guys are looking for stable, mature woman who’re ready for the responsibilities of raising a family. Maybe in your heart you’re ready to settle down, but your life doesn’t really reflect it—working late or partying every night, not setting aside money for the future, and not taking care of your health. If so, see what you can do to get your life shaped up.

Believe it or not, you probably do stand a pretty good chances of figuring out how to make your ex boyfriend want you back. After all, assuming you had a good relationship to begin with, at one point, you’re ex thought you were great just the way you were when he met you. Let him know you’re still that same amazing woman and he may just come around.

How To Get Over Someone Special A Gals Guide

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By , March 16, 2015 11:53 pm

Are you wondering how to get over someone who meant the world to you? Was the break up a surprise and now you are left adrift? Here’s some advice on how to get over someone special.

First of all, determine whether the relationship is truly over. If you still harbor getting back together, you will not be able to get over the person. You can hang on to a guy for days, months, or even years when there is no hope. Until you decide it’s over, it’s not – even if the love is not reciprocated. You are not able to move on until you let go.

Once you have decided it really is over, take concrete steps to end the relationship. For one thing, do a property exchange. Pack up all of the things he has at your house and ship them to him. Get rid of everything – including his toothbrush. Ask for anything of yours back that he has. Clearing yourself of each other’s things will launch you into your new single status.

If you have financial entanglements, get them straightened up right away. This may be as simple as paying him back the $20 he lent you last week at the mall or it can be as complicated as refinancing a house. Whatever you have to do, do it as soon as possible so that your finances are no longer intermeshed.

You have to decide what to do about people and places you have in common too. It is not uncommon for a couple to decide “who gets the church” after a break up. Sometimes it is not healthy to continue to run into a person with whom you no longer have a romantic relationship.

Similarly, you may have to “divorce” some of his friends. While they didn’t do anything to you, they have always been closer to him than you. While you can still be polite and friendly when you occasionally run into them, they may be people that you don’t want to contact on a regular basis any longer.

Next, you need to start to have a new life. If you were close to the person you have broken up with, you probably spent a lot of time with him. This is time that you will have to fill with new people and activities.

Perhaps you let relationships with friends and family die when you started getting involved with your ex. This is a good time to renew these relationships.

It is also a good time to work on making new relationships. You probably spent time doing things your ex wanted to do but that didn’t thrill you. Take advantage of this time to launch your own hobbies and interests. You could take a writing class at the local university, take a dance class at an aerobics studio, start a scrapbooking circle with a group from church, or get season tickets to the opera. As you get involved with these things that interest you, you will meet new people.

It is very likely that your next boyfriend will grow out of the new circle of people you meet through your new activities. And, hooking up again is the very best way to get over someone special!

Is Your Marriage In Trouble The Answer Inside

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By , March 15, 2015 4:48 am

Is your marriage in trouble? This is a question that many people ask themselves, and the answer, unfortunately, tends to be yes. More than half of all marriages end in divorce, so the odds are already against you. But finding out if you have a marriage in trouble early can be the key to fixing the relationship before it falls apart.

A marriage in trouble can be saved, but you need to be willing to ask the hard questions and do the work necessary to make it work. The earlier you can figure out that something is going wrong, the easier it is going to be to fix it. The key is you need to know the warning signs.

Warning Sign Number One: Lack of Communication

This is usually one of the earliest signs of a marriage in trouble. People stop talking, which just leads to problems festering beneath the surface. If it seems like your spouse or you just aren’t interested in talking, then this is a sign of trouble ahead.

Warning Sign Number Two: Less Time Spent Together

When a relationship starts going bad, people start to pull apart. They will start finding more and more reasons to be anywhere other than home with their spouse. If you realize that your partner is spending lots of time away without much of an excuse, then this too could be a sign of problems.

Warning Sign Number Three: Less Physical Intimacy

If your spouse seems to be losing interest in sex, this is a big sign that something could be going wrong. There can be other reasons for this, but a sudden decrease in sexual interest is not something you should take lightly.

Warning Sign Number Four: Lack of Respect

When you have a marriage in trouble, you may notice that your spouse seems to have lost all respect for you. They don’t take your problems seriously, and they don’t seem to care when they’ve hurt you. Mutual respect is key to any relationship, but especially marriage, so this is a sign you really need to keep an eye on.

Warning Sign Number Five: Apathy

You’ve stopped fighting. Your spouse isn’t arguing with you anymore. This may seem like a good thing, but you need to determine whether or not you’ve stopped fighting because the problems are solved or because your spouse has just given up. If it’s the latter, this is a bad sign. It means your partner no longer cares, and has disengaged from the relationship. This is one of the worst signs of a marriage in trouble.

Once you’ve figured out that you have a marriage in trouble, then what? Well, then you need to start the process of finding and fixing whatever it was that brought you to this point. It’s not going to be easy, for most of us, but it can be done with the right plan.

Fortunately, there are many good, effective guides and systems out there to show you the steps you need to take to fix things. You just need to find the right one to save your marriage in trouble.

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